Is Dating Dead?

dating ivyarum

I was on the phone with one of my girlfriends when the topic of dating came up. While we were airing our grievances, it hit me. I’m not sure if it’s because of the overload of options thanks to dating apps like tinder; or if everyone is just a commitment phobe, but I’m pretty sure dating culture is dead. Or REAL different than I remembered it.

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30 Things Before 30: A list


With work, relationships and everything in between, it can get easy to lose ourselves to obligations and fall into a routine. Remember that thing you said you were going to try? You were suppose to make time for it next week? But next week turns into next month. And eventually starting this new hobby or going on this new trip becomes a “someday” thing.

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Turned All My L’s Into Lessons: An Update


After a much needed break, I’m back and I’m better! It’s only the second week of April and its already been a whirlwind. My car was broken into and so many important things were stolen from me.(also who steals dirty clothes???) I had to deactivate all my cards, hit the dmv for a new license, get my windows fixed and make an appointment to get them tinted.

I know they say to never keep things in plain sight in your vehicle so save that conversation for someone else. What about when you lock things in your trunk + glove compartment but they break into your car and get into those places too? You get got! And boy, they got me.

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The Lies My Depression Told Me

ivyarum blog depression

I’ve never hurt myself. I thought therapy was reserved for people with real problems. Why should I seek professional help over a couple of bad days or weeks? I went to work and I got things done. Ya girl was fully functioning; I wasn’t like the people I’d see on tv with depression. But the first lie depression told me was I wasn’t depressed.

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Let’s Talk Hair

hair ivyarum

You can’t open a magazine without being bombarded by ads about hair. Cleaning it, changing it, or maintaining it. But this post is about body hair and our obsession with removing it. Let’s just face it, western culture has a really unhealthy relationship with body hair.

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Self Reflections and Notes on Confidence

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I’ve been reading a lot of books with themes that touch on confidence and inadequacy. Lately, my levels of both seem to fluctuate and vary by day. I was in a yoga class one evening and it hit me. I have lived with myself for twenty seven years. For twenty seven years I’ve been strong. I’ve been caring, resilient and lovable. I know these things to be true. So why am I so caught up in what anyone else thinks?

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Hi, Remember me

*Dusts off cobwebs from my blog*

I was doing so good y’all. I started the year off right, making regular posts and then bam! Life happened. Sorry its been a ghost town here. A lot of things happened last month.

There were jobs I applied to/worked hard to prepare for and didn’t get. I had a 10 day work week at my current job. I felt like the walking dead. I’ve been studying for this certification. Basically I have a lot on my plate, but the most exciting thing to happen last month was my sister in law’s baby shower. I’m going to be an auntie!

My brother is having his first child and the whole fam is going nuts. My mom has been asking about grand children for years and I’m pretty sure she’s more excited than my brother’s wife. Honestly though, it was a relief to be surrounded by family and not worry about work, bills or any other stressors. That little break was good for me. I feel like I’m in such a better place than I was in March. I promise I wont leave y’all hanging like that again.


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I’m Sorry You Hate Valentine’s Day

valentine's day

I remember growing up and being excited for Valentine’s Day. My dad would take me to the drug store and I’d pick out the perfect valentine card set for my class. I also couldn’t leave my teacher out. Or the class aid. Or the bus driver. I made sure to spread the love all around.

If we fast forward to the present, you’ll find that I’m still that little girl that wants to spread the love all around. But something happened with my peers where they began to loathe Valentine’s Day. Around the beginning of February, I notice people were getting really cynical.

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